I hate my life!!

Question:
Im on social security disability for depression, low income, im alone no friends.I have a g e d. I hate my life, but thankful to be alive. I need advice bad i have no clue what to do or where to start.

 

Response:
Dear Daniel Downer,

I certainly do not want to belittle your situation. However in love, I must tell you that I have a few sons, so I tend to be a little rigid when it comes to discussions with other men. I raise boys, so when I talk to men there is a certain expectancy, or mutual respect, that words exchanged are not malicious, but out of love. I must be straight forward with you, when I first read this question my first thought was – man up. I have a small pet peeve with people who say they hate their life when life is such a blessing. Coming from a situation where I’ve lost a LOT of people, I reverence each day. Is it peachy every day for me? Absolutely not. Sometimes it seems there are more bad days than good. But then I have to check myself and realize what I do have, versus what I don’t have. Just because I’m sad about a situation does not give me the right to be Debbie Downer and mope around, bringing others down around me, or worse…pushing them away from me altogether. I firmly believe, coming from someone who’s been through numerous trials and storms, that life is about perception (click here to see my old post on perception). Your life will NEVER be better than you perceive it to be. If you don’t learn how to visualize yourself in a better situation, then you will never be in a better situation. You have to learn to be the visionary that God called you to be. If you have trouble, try to find others who are where you want to be. We all, at any age, need mentors. If you can’t locate one, try the church, or search for groups of the sort online.

I also have learned that sometimes in life you have to assess where you are and why? If you find yourself alone with no friends, ask yourself why? Is it because of your demeanor? Or is it something else? Maybe God is distancing you from people so he can work on you, stretch you, in a particular area of life. My advice is to man up and try to grab hold of some self-confidence within. Start by trying to adjust your diet and exercise. If you don’t have anything else equipment wise, you have feet. So start with walking, then evolve into more rigorous routines. Adjusting your diet and exercising alone will drastically change your mindset if you do it continually over a period of time. I also suggest periods of meditation. Women constantly pamper themselves with spas and other relaxing things, whereas most men seem to internalize and rarely find other constructive outlets. What do you like to do? Build a model car, learn a new craft, or see when you can attend a free seminar on a topic of your interest. Rent a good movie and make your favorite meal and enjoy yourself. If you can’t afford to rent a movie, go to the library and check out a free movie. Look on the internet for a new, inexpensive recipe and dare to try something different. Or spend time in the park enjoying the sounds and smells. There are many things you can do, but first you must allow yourself to accept the fact that you deserve to be happy. Open your eyes to the good things around you.

Change how you perceive your life and take charge. You mentioned you have a GED like it’s a bad thing? Some people do not have that, so feel proud of that accomplishment. Change your perception! Now what’s the next step? You don’t have x,y,z but what do you have? What resources are available? Maybe you can take an online course or a class at the local community college. I understand that having low income is a difficult situation to rise above, but if you don’t take any steps to sow into yourself education or trade wise, you will be in the same predicament. What are your goals? Plan your life out, otherwise life will plan it for you. Take some initiative to think outside of your circumstance and have faith that your steps will eventually lead you somewhere. I understand being lonely is a bad place to be, but use that time wisely to sow into yourself. You do that properly, you will reap the benefits of a healthy life, healthier relationships, and overall contentment.

Be blessed my friend, and keep your head up!

 

 

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